Things that bother me, part 9000»

Posted: July 29, 2011
Filed under: Words and Expressions

Does anyone else get as annoyed as I do when people use hashtags outside of The Twitters? #getoffmylawn #noseriouslygetthehelloffmylawn

List of lists of lists of lists»

Posted: June 01, 2011
Filed under: Words and Expressions

It only has one item so far:

I have a list problem, but so does the entire inter-net.

Great success, or greatest success?»

Posted: January 02, 2011
Filed under: Words and Expressions
Tagged: 

How to be successful at blogging

Blogging what? Blogging blogs in your blog, of course! Post all the time, whether you have anything to say or not. Filler is your friend!

How to be unsuccessful at blogging

If you don’t have anything to say, don’t.

Pop Quiz

This blog that I have just now blogged here in my blog: is it successful or unsuccessful? Show your work.

4 Da Shorteez»

Posted: May 04, 2010

Yes

I will freely admit that I probably have at least the second worst URL in the history of the earth planet.

But

In my defense: I was computing under the influence when I registered it, and all the good ones were taken.

Anyway

In keeping with the times, I have looked into this whole URL shortening thing that’s been taking several of the internets by storm. And so I present, for your ease of use and mine, something that would fit on a business card to be handed out to babes:

http://bit.ly/wwwhatever (wwwowsers that’s short!)

Facebook values our privacy, amirite?»

Oh.

LET ME SHOW YOU MY USABILITIES»

Posted: February 25, 2010
Filed under: Words and Expressions

My usabilities:

you know you don't not want them

Let me show you them.

Someone owes me some groyalties»

Posted: January 15, 2010
Filed under: Words and Expressions

So, let’s set the wayback machine to a more innocent time. Barring that, let’s go back to October 19, 2006. I wrote this in my inter-net livejournal online blog page site:

Title: I cold invented a word tonight

I uttered the new word “GROINTMENT” many times in the course of this evening.

A. said, “I think ‘groin’ is the ugliest word in the English language” and Ted said that “ointment” was even worse, so of course I had to top them both.

GROINTMENT. Groin + Ointment = Grointment!

GROINTMENT! “Dapper Dan, for the groin!” (tm Ted)

G R O I N T M E N T !

Order now, operators are standing by…

———

And then, I came up with the best song title ever: “Frodo applies the grointment to Sam”. I am never drinking again.

So tonight I was thinking to myself, and wondering if anyone on earth was insane enough to have also come up with that word. The answer may surprise you, but probably not »

This was too long to be a status update»

Posted: December 23, 2009
Filed under: Words and Expressions

Yeah, so there’s that movie coming out that’s named after everyone’s favorite relationship status on Facebook: “Single”. No, wait: “It’s Complicated”. But what you may not know is that the original title for the movie was “You Have 29382638 Farmville Requests”.

Now click here, to finish this post.

WWWExclusive!»

Posted: September 08, 2009
Filed under: Words and Expressions

Facebook is testing out a new feature on their site—the “show only features that work” view:

so fresh, so clean

(No, really, I see this view 4 out of 5 times I go there.)

I DID IT»

Posted: June 24, 2009
Filed under: Words and Expressions

I wish there was a social networking site where everyone would leave me the fuck alone

I think a blog with comments disabled has to count for something, yes?